"You have reached Solus zos Galvus. I fear I am unavailable at the moment, but should your query be of an urgent nature, pray leave a message. I shall endeavor to return it anon."
[That eases him. A little. But it does not purge the guilt from his bosom. Likewise, he turns on his camera, making sure it's only of his shoulders and up. He hardly needs to send them back to the other topic due to sloppiness. His gaze is soft and loving, full of wistfulness as is his small smile.]
Would that you could...but I suppose this will do for now. Two weeks is naught to us, and I have waited far longer for your return.
[Oops, dipping back into the heavy topics here, wasn’t he? He carries his ‘gear around, redressing into his hanger of clothes. The robe must have been at the laundromat. Of course people stare at him as it is, but no one was expecting a Buddhist monk to be here sucking dick. ]
[...Oh dammit all. If the question weren't so distracting, he might have asked about his...spare clothes. But it doesn't matter. He can feel panic rising in him as he realizes the landmine he inadvertently stepped on. He never confirmed if his friend knew about the war between the gods, if he knew of the fate that would come to their people...
AND NOW HE'S GONE AND GOOFED. He keeps his expression pretty neutral of the panic rattling his mind, but it shows in his eyes.]
Well, I have been here for more than a moon.
[He knows how weak that sounds, how that is such an obvious dodge, and he hates it. But look, he's trying to work with this whiplash conversation post orgasm, and he's overworked on top of it! Cut him some slack!]
[He sighs but he’s not about to corner him over this, too. That just wasn’t his style. ]
There was a time in our past that you might have called that a blessing. Well, how circumstance changes all else around it.
[He steps outside, the gentle breeze carrying his hair as he reaffixes his mask.]
It seems so easy to fall into these intimate exchanges with others here. Have you found yourself given any attentions? One might wonder with how quickly you found yourself home.
[He's still a fool with how he keeps pushing Hythlodaeus away like this, but he doesn't know what to do with himself, honestly.]
I try not to speak intimately with others here, little do I need such connections when this world is unstable. As for my settling...'twas with fair ease, though this will never be home.
[Though, he's spoken quite intimately with Estinien, but that's different in his mind.]
At being forgiven, there's clear emotion that flashes across his expression, and behind his eyes. It's such a simple thing, and maybe it should not strike him like that, and yet it does. He's been at his toils for eons, doing the most horrible things to ensure his people's restoration, regretting every moment he wasted in Amaurot. Knowing not what would come, know that those days truly had a limit, and that life would die well before its time.
That his friends would do the same. That everyone would, save him and two others.
When he speaks, his voice is thick and strained, but he's trying to hide that fact, just like he's trying to hide the emotion behind his face.]
Sure they can, if one knows how to well reason with themselves.
[Hythlodaeus stares directly into the camera and can’t help but laugh uproariously into his face. ]
Oh? Have you become a master of denial? What next? Food? Sleep? Don’t be ridiculous, Hades. You would make me engage with such a silly joke as if it were a serious point of debate?
[He's quiet for a moment, his expression clearly contemplative and...frustrated.]
...The mind can weather far more than you give it credit for. Mayhap yours is one that gets lost without constant love and affection, but I have learned that I can fair endure more than you suggest me capable.
I tire of this. You should return to the others ere they worry you've gotten yourself lost in more than simply your sentimental idealism.
I’m already on my way. Would you have me run? I’ll leave you alone if that’s truly what you wish... [ He hasn’t missed the little shifts in his dear friends’ expression, of course. But it was so much to unpack. He wonders if he should have pointed out the bruising.]
Well, I see no point in continuing this conversation, you've well ruined what enjoyment there would be from this interaction—unless you are not satisfied with that?
[He mulls on that for a moment, then shakes his head.]
Nay, the mood has passed.
[Without thinking, he runs his hand through his hair in frustration...and wipes some of his mess right into it. He freezes the moment he realizes he's done this, but then tries to play it off, keeping his hand there as he lightly grips his hair.
He'll just shower after this.]
I shouldn't keep you. Both you and Estinien need your rest for travel, and it's getting late...
[Hythlodaeus raises his eyebrows. Had he had the chance to wash his hands? He’d pushed his friend to the threshold already anyway. He says nothing but the visible part of his facial expression betrays his thoughts. The merciful thing would be to allow him a graceful exit to go wash up...]
...Yes, but of course. We do need our rest. Goodnight, Hades.
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If only this place had proper teleportation, I would be by your side tonight.
[It had been too long since he had seen Hades. In any way he wanted to see him, that was.]
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Would that you could...but I suppose this will do for now. Two weeks is naught to us, and I have waited far longer for your return.
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[Oops, dipping back into the heavy topics here, wasn’t he? He carries his ‘gear around, redressing into his hanger of clothes. The robe must have been at the laundromat. Of course people stare at him as it is, but no one was expecting a Buddhist monk to be here sucking dick. ]
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AND NOW HE'S GONE AND GOOFED. He keeps his expression pretty neutral of the panic rattling his mind, but it shows in his eyes.]
Well, I have been here for more than a moon.
[He knows how weak that sounds, how that is such an obvious dodge, and he hates it. But look, he's trying to work with this whiplash conversation post orgasm, and he's overworked on top of it! Cut him some slack!]
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There was a time in our past that you might have called that a blessing. Well, how circumstance changes all else around it.
[He steps outside, the gentle breeze carrying his hair as he reaffixes his mask.]
It seems so easy to fall into these intimate exchanges with others here. Have you found yourself given any attentions? One might wonder with how quickly you found yourself home.
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[He's still a fool with how he keeps pushing Hythlodaeus away like this, but he doesn't know what to do with himself, honestly.]
I try not to speak intimately with others here, little do I need such connections when this world is unstable. As for my settling...'twas with fair ease, though this will never be home.
[Though, he's spoken quite intimately with Estinien, but that's different in his mind.]
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You were, but I forgive you.
[He makes a thoughtful noise. ] I’m not sure if one can simply “opt out” of basic needs like love and comfort.
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At being forgiven, there's clear emotion that flashes across his expression, and behind his eyes. It's such a simple thing, and maybe it should not strike him like that, and yet it does. He's been at his toils for eons, doing the most horrible things to ensure his people's restoration, regretting every moment he wasted in Amaurot. Knowing not what would come, know that those days truly had a limit, and that life would die well before its time.
That his friends would do the same. That everyone would, save him and two others.
When he speaks, his voice is thick and strained, but he's trying to hide that fact, just like he's trying to hide the emotion behind his face.]
Sure they can, if one knows how to well reason with themselves.
[Yet, it's clear he's full of shit.]
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Oh? Have you become a master of denial? What next? Food? Sleep? Don’t be ridiculous, Hades. You would make me engage with such a silly joke as if it were a serious point of debate?
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[Hades scowls at his friend, utterly unappreciative of his laughter.]
I will not expire from the lack of love and comfort like I would water or food.
[Not that he's been the best about that either.]
Cease such absurdity, 'tis not as much of a need as you might wish to believe.
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[He sighs as his tone of voice becomes slow and even once more. ]
Without love and comfort the mind withers muchlike the body withers without food and rest. What clear thoughts can be made in such a state?
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...The mind can weather far more than you give it credit for. Mayhap yours is one that gets lost without constant love and affection, but I have learned that I can fair endure more than you suggest me capable.
I tire of this. You should return to the others ere they worry you've gotten yourself lost in more than simply your sentimental idealism.
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I’m already on my way. Would you have me run? I’ll leave you alone if that’s truly what you wish... [ He hasn’t missed the little shifts in his dear friends’ expression, of course. But it was so much to unpack. He wonders if he should have pointed out the bruising.]
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[He says bitterly.]
Well, I see no point in continuing this conversation, you've well ruined what enjoyment there would be from this interaction—unless you are not satisfied with that?
[Well, someone's bitchy.]
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[His smile slowly broadens as his eyes flick down the the camera before he looks back to where he’s going. ]
Unless you would truly rather be rid of me.
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Nay, the mood has passed.
[Without thinking, he runs his hand through his hair in frustration...and wipes some of his mess right into it. He freezes the moment he realizes he's done this, but then tries to play it off, keeping his hand there as he lightly grips his hair.
He'll just shower after this.]
I shouldn't keep you. Both you and Estinien need your rest for travel, and it's getting late...
[It's really not that late...]
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...Yes, but of course. We do need our rest. Goodnight, Hades.
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Yes.
[Short, but he's a little mortified with himself at the moment.]
Rest well, my friend. Goodnight.
[And he cuts the feed, and immediately tosses his 'gear off the bed, and makes his way for the washroom. Goddammit.]